UKIP spring conference is underway. Or it might be over – it’s difficult to tell with UKIP spring conference. Anyhow, this year the big story was Nigel’s absence.
He turned up rather late as a result of having been in America for the Conservative Political Action Conference. For those who have never been to one of these hoo-haws, as I imagine most of you reading this haven’t, one day in such a climate would put your “that Nick Clegg is so right-wing” delusions to bed forever. The American Republican Party is right-wing beyond the furthest dimensions of British thought, from both the Left and the Right. In fact, what is thought of as “the Right” in Britain would mostly be considered near communist at something like the CPAC.
“I don’t believe all buses should be destroyed in a big bonfire actually,” says the journalist from the British Spectator.
“Communist,” says the old lady who considers the rest of the crowd a little left-wing for her taste, after someone near her suggested having a federal government might not be all bad. This is a group of people for whom the idea that sound fiscal policy of any kind is a waste of time because Jesus is going to end the world in a few months time is mainstream thought. And what’s brilliant? Farage fit in here like a pig in his own poo.
“In the past, there’s always been a member of the British Conservative party that has come along to this event, but I think it’s fair to say that the British Conservative party now have actually become social democrats and mostly merged with the others.”
Uh, Nigel, this is really uncomfortable, but I have to take time to remind you: your party is in explicit favour of social democracy these days, remember? All that “we’re the only party that can save the NHS” stuff? I know you hate that line of messaging, and sound like you’re gagging on your own vomit when you have to talk about it, but it is your party’s line at the end of the day. Perhaps if you hate it that much, you could try and change it. If I recall correctly, you are the leader of the party.
As a result of his rocking with the Palins and the Santorums (such bastions of freedom both, they want to ban birth control they are so “libertarian”), Nigel missed a great deal of his own party’s conference. Shame, as it was one to remember. As always with these UKIP extravaganzas, one is spoilt for choice. Only the best bit then:
A leaflet that read: “the State is allowing the sexual grooming of our Primary School children for same sex attraction” went on to say, charmingly: “Using the bizarre excuser that young primary school children are constantly taunting each other about ‘homosexuality’, CHIPS is indoctrinating children to confuse their gender identity and encouraging them to read stories about, to think about and to sing songs about same-sex attraction and then to act them out in class.” How heart-warming. Glad to see UKIP championing those British values of tolerance and liberalism.
We saw the real Nigel Farage in America: a very, very, very right wing man who wishes his party could be some sort of Tea Party in Britain, but has been told by those around him it’s never going to fly. So he has to come and rub shoulders with Sarah Palin and wish things were different. I wish you were American too, Nigel, don’t worry.